Negging is a form of emotional manipulation, wherein a person deliberately, yet subtly conveys something negative to another. The ways range from covert to more obvious overt ways of negging through back handed compliments and insults that are thinly veiled as constructive criticism. 

Negging has unfortunately also been used as a flirting “tactic” by pick up artists and women were usually the target of negging. The idea behind this sort of negging objectifies women and often views them as not deserving of respect, with negging being a sort of game wherein it’s possible to knock the confidence of the woman such that their attention is ‘snared’ by the negger, who then is the only person who can build back that confidence. However, this assumption is highly demeaning, misogynistic and problematic, fuelled by ideas of toxic masculinity. This kind of manipulation doesn’t hold space for a healthy, positive relationship to develop. 

This behaviour tends to undermine and demean the receiver and can over time erode their self-esteem, leading them to actively seek out the negger’s approval. This is manipulation and emotional abuse, and is a toxic and unhealthy trait. 

If you or anyone you know is experiencing this form of emotional abuse, know that it is absolutely not okay.  

You are deserving of a healthy, happy, loving relationship. Please reach out for support. To schedule a therapeutic conversation with us, visit our website. 

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